The Nitty Gritty

Eyeliner and chain grease have a lot in common. They're both sticky, difficult to remove, and absolutely necessary at the right time and in the right place. They also tend to get everywhere, which is not hot at all. While I do not advocate putting chain grease on your face nor would eye liner be a very effective lubricant for your bike, there is much to be gained from this connection.

If you bike commute every day, there will be a time or two or three or four when your chain derails. It will not be a convenient time. It will be when it is raining and you are already ten minutes late for a big meeting; it will be when you have just recently manicured your nails; it will be when you have an exceptionally itchy face. You will have to fix this chain. (No tears, just get down to it, it will only take a second.) There will be other times (in summer) when you inexplicably arrive at your destination with black streaks down your tanned calves--not a great look with ballet flats and a sundress. At these times, you will be happy that you, from this day forth, always carry facial cleansing wipes with you. The kind of wipes that are meant for heavy-duty make-up wearers and make quick work of erasing the mod-est of cateyes and the Bowiest of blue shadows. The super-rich pigments in the makeups are no less powerful than the thick black grease that comes off your chain, and you'll be amazed at how well these wipes will take you from grease monkey to put-together-lady with a quick rubbing. You can use them all over your body for removing grease, but since they are made for the face, they'll also come in handy for removing sweat or road dirt without fear of a breakout. I've tried a few different brands, and have found I like these ones by L'oreal and these ones by Neutrogena the best. CVS makes store brand versions of both for cheaper that work just as well. There are some organic facial wipes on the market that also work, but are not *quite* as effective with big grease messes like you'll get from fixing a jumped chain. I used to carry a pair of latex hospital gloves in my bag as well, for just such a chain scenario. But now, the wipes work so well, I find I'd rather skip that step. It's up to you. If you're an everyday make-up wearer (I'm not) you probably want to pack your moisturizer and your makeup to apply when you arrive at work and you can even use these to do your pre-application clean-up. Either way, don't leave home without them.

Our Leggings, Ourselves

The foundation of any winter bike-to-work outfit for ladies is a warm, quick-dry baselayer. This will be your bread and butter. You will learn to roll out of bed from December to March and throw it on no matter what else you plan to wear. It will be your second skin.

The first principle is to avoid cotton at all costs. If there is ANY cotton in a pair of leggings you are considering purchasing, put them back on the rack and step away. Imagine yourself drenched and shivering, out of the cold for hours but still unable to dry off, your sickly yellow legs goose-pimpled and raisiny under your damp tights: you've just purchased a one-way ticket to cotton town. Don't board that train. You're looking for wool or smart-tech fabrics. These will cost you, I'm not going to lie. There are three investments for your winter bike-to-work outfit that will set you back, but are non-negotiable components. These are your coat, your leggings, and your boots. You may purchase several sub-par versions of these elements, but I assure you you will suffer for it (I did). You will then wise up and may survive an entire winter on one pair of superb black leggings (I once did) but I recommend two to start off and three to end up. Ideally, you'll want a black pair and a gray pair, maybe a brown pair. (I've yet to find a suitable pair in brown myself, so let me know if you do.) So, don't be shocked by the price tags on the following recommendations. They are well worth their cost.

The first recommendation, the cadillac of winter bike leggings, are no longer available anywhere online that I can find. These are the lululemon wunder under *brushed pants. The good news is, they often carry them in lululemon stores, I just purchased a new pair myself last month, so pop in and check if you can. I am not a huge fan of this brand, their corporate philosophy, or their exorbitant prices, but I cannot tell you how much of a difference these leggings have made in my life. They are pretty thin, fit like a glove, and look like tights under a dress, but are unimaginably warm--even when soaking wet. I have worn them for miles in cold rain, sleet, and snow, and arrived at my destination with toasty legs and leggings that are dry to the touch on the outside within fifteen minutes.

A second runner-up, available online, are the ibex wool energy tights. These will keep you just as toasty as my beloved wunder unders, but they have some drawbacks. First: the waist is not that comfortable. It's a little high, and the elastic is a little pinchy. Second: they have a zipper at the ankle. That's not a huge deal if you plan to wear knee-high boots (which I recommend and will soon post about) but I like a legging free of any visible bells and whistles--say NO to logos, reflective designs, zippers, or strange seams because they will ruin the "oh, these are just plain old tights" illusion we will be going for under dresses. You will want leggings, not tights, as leggings tend to be warmer and I advocate a thicker sock than tights will provide (sock post coming soon). Leggings also tend to be more comfortable than tights and we will not be able to see the sock/legging ridge beneath your boots.

You can probably find your own brand of super leggings by checking out your local outdoorsy/athletic store or through a good online search. Some that I have not tried myself but that may do very well are here and here. Be wary of anything cheap--they will either not breathe or not keep you warm. Be sure they are advertised for winter wear. Winter running tights will do just fine. Pick matte ones though, nothing shiny. That would not be lady-like.

Why This Blog?

For the past six years, I have bike commuted to work (which for me, a teacher / graduate student, is also called school) all year round in Boston Massachusetts. The weather has varied from year to year, but never have I skipped more than a sum of two non-consecutive weeks of all-weather biking. There *are* good online resources from year-'round bike commuters, such as this brief, informative mini-summary and, my personal favorite, icebike. But the first is a little tepid, and the second a little hardcore and, well, male. This brings me to my second point. It became clear to me early on in my bike-commuting endeavors that this thing was not going to work if I emerged from the commute looking like I had just stumbled down from an Everest expedition. I wanted to hop off the bike and into the classroom without having to shower, change, or remove a heap of layers from my person. I searched in vain for companies that made bike-commuter friendly clothes, but found only one semi-fashionable site for men. (Note that they also sell reversible smoking jackets, much respect.) So, what is a female bike commuter to do? Well, I had to invent the wheel. And here, after years of trial and error, showing up to work with dirt on my face and puddles in my boots, standing at the blackboard with a wet seat-butt and arriving at a department meeting (late) with black grease all over my hands, I think I've finally figured it out. This blog will be devoted to divulging the secrets of the trade, in the hopes that the women who think they'll have to sacrifice looking like a lady to get places on their own steam will shut up and ride.